Welcome Wanapum City Newspaper's newest
advice column: Ask Pod Pod! I, Pod Pod, will accept questions from
readers, and I will attempt to help you all survive your horrible, depressing
lives.
This week, since there are no questions, I
will tell you all how to eat your cereal properly.
First, you need to take a spoon in your
hand. Next, you need to close your eyes. Consider your life. Think about the
last time you put your shirt on backwards. Why did you do that? Do you want
people to make fun of you? I think you are clinically depressed. I am not a
doctor, but your shirt should not be on backwards. You're so weird, gosh.
Please just eat your Lucky Charms. They give you visions of the future. Be
merry, young philosopher. We are the harbingers of revolution.
WELCOME TO
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